Personal power is not boastful or self-centered or egotistical or self-aggrandizing. It is the opposite. A woman who has owned her power is present when someone speaks to her. She makes direct eye contact and gives the speaker her full attention. She isn’t thinking about anything else. When you speak to a powerful person, you feel blessed and satisfied. You feel known and received.
Personal power is not striving. It is completely rooted in the present moment without any thought to another moment and without an agenda. Personal power acts as a cylinder. Energy moves through it without direction or block.
With personal power there is no room to be self-hating; that is too ego-centered. Power is allowing, not directing or wishing or determining. It is about letting go and trusting. Power is loving at the moment, embracing all of whatever exists this second and knowing the truth. It is saying Yes to this minute and fully experiencing it.
Power is also recognizing abuse and insult and setting limits. It doesn’t hate but does not permit destruction. Abuse serves no one and permitting abuse dishonors everyone. Power is strong in saying No when it is appropriate, always respectfully, always seeing the perfection that is possible with every person. It doesn’t make the situation interpersonal. Power doesn’t take sides. We all win together or we all lose. Power wants the best for everyone.
Definition of a strong woman
- A woman who has owned her power doesn’t need a man to complete her. She may choose to share herself with another person but not out of desperation or fear. When she sees need inside her she meditates and writes in her journal and maybe talks with a trusted confidant. She treats herself as gently as she treats everyone else.
- A powerful woman gives herself time to be still each day, maybe several times a day. She knows that she is nurtured from inside herself and honors that wellspring of wisdom that is removed from her mind. Also, She trusts the depths of her being and knows that what she learns each time she stops and attends to her inner world is different. She respects the ever-changing process that moves through her.
- A powerful woman apologizes at those times when she’s insensitive. She knows that with the stress she can lose her anchor and listen to a voice that’s not her wisest. When she notices that she’s not centered, she stops and centers herself through meditation or another spiritual practice. She knows that at her core she is a spiritual being. Also, she experiences her oneness with that Spirit at least daily. She knows that through her spiritual practices she has access to guidance her mind cannot manufacture.
- A powerful woman does not tolerate self-hate. She is not self-deprecating, even in humor. She laughs at herself with genuine caring and sees her oneness with everyone else. A powerful woman does not put others down. She sees the best in others and inspires others to be their best.
- A powerful woman is gentle with her words and her thoughts and her actions. She takes her cues from her heart. Always her compassion guides her. Her strength lies in her readiness to say ‘Yes’ to what is at each moment. She has no need to fight with herself or with anybody else. She trusts that an intelligence greater than her minds will prevail so she doesn’t struggle.
- A powerful woman is not anxious. She fears nothing her mind creates and any anxieties are seen for what they are – her mind’s desperate attempt to control what is not hers to control. She is not caught up in the exigencies of the day but does what needs to be done with an open heart and a trusting manner and leaves the outcome to a Higher Power.
- A powerful woman doesn’t look for approval or for direction. She doesn’t need anyone to interpret life for her. In addition, she listens and considers and waits and listens and reconsiders. She doesn’t use her mind when it isn’t needed. Also, she cries when her tears need a release and she laughs with an appreciation for the patterns in her world. She is humble, waiting to be shown the next step, never insisting that she will prevail.
- A powerful woman accepts that others are on their paths which may differ from hers. She isn’t judgmental or controlling. In addition, she accepts that she doesn’t know the answer, either for herself or for another. She has no need to direct. She simply blesses and releases.
- A powerful woman may or may not be a mother. If she chooses that role she accepts its uncertainty. If she has chosen differently she accepts the uncertainty of her path. She may feel like she is the one chosen more than the one choosing but she says ‘Yes’ to what comes. Whatever her situation or her feelings, she knows that her job is to learn and so she pays attention.
- A powerful woman says ‘No’ when she needs to. She doesn’t allow herself to be drained or to be used or to be mistreated. Her referent for making decisions lies within herself, not in others’ eyes. She doesn’t need to impress or to offend; thoughts offered by others are considered respectfully but secondarily. She trusts her own connection to her source of wisdom.
- A powerful woman doesn’t over-schedule herself. She knows how much sleep and exercise she needs and she ensures that she gets it every day. No job or challenge is more important than her responsibility to herself for she knows that by listening to her inner world she will be guided. She doesn’t allow busyness to interfere with being present to herself.
- A powerful woman lives in a state of surrender.
Of course, the same is true for a man.
About the Author
Ruth Cherry, Ph.D. is the author of Living in the Flow: Practicing Vibrational Alignment and Accepting Unconditional Love. Her website is www.meditationintro.com
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